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Raising Boys


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#1 TamiW

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Posted 07 July 2005 - 12:00 PM

Things I've learned from my Boys:

1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft.
house 4inches deep.

2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
rollerblades, they can ignite.

3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
restaurant.

4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not
strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough however, if tied to a paint can, to spread
paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 ft. room.

5.) When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a
few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long
way.

6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit
by a ceiling fan.

7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already
too late

8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year
old Boy.

11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

12.) Super glue is forever.

13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still
can't walk on water.

14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15.) VCR's do not eject "PB &J" sandwiches even though TV commercials
show they do.

16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not
like ovens.

20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.

21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms
dizzy.

22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23.) It seems cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
fluid.

Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without
kids

a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical!

B) For those who already have children past this age, this is
hilarious.

c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.

d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.

e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.

#2 Pearl Girl

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Posted 07 July 2005 - 12:31 PM

Amazing the things boys can think of...

Been there, done that and I could certainly add to the list!
(Hilarious to me!)

#3 lesliefavela

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Posted 07 July 2005 - 12:48 PM

Oh, my. Please tell me you didn't have to go through all of these yourself! ROFLOL
I have 4 kids of my own, and I can relate. But I don't remember their antics being this chaotic. But, then, maybe I just didn't catch all of them. :rofl:
Everything happens for a reason.

Leslie

#4 TamiW

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Posted 07 July 2005 - 12:49 PM

No I didnt go thru all of these. But I have lived several. LOL




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