I Am So Angry & Hurt I dislike my life
Posted 10 May 2008 - 12:30 PM
Posted 10 May 2008 - 12:39 PM
As the kids grow older, I realize that time with Grandma is less exciting, so I tried to spend
more time with them as pre-school and early elementary times. Then they always know they can
go to Grandma... even if they don't feel the urge all the time.
ALSO, families struggle making time to spend with their own children as well... sometimes that
cuts into Grandparent time... a fact of life.
Here are a few hopeful solutions:
- 1. Tell them how important your time with them really is and what it means to you... how disappointed you are when you have made plans for naught! Be HONEST, and transparent to them... let them see your heart!
2. Suggest they put your "date" on their calendars when they mention it to you... if they don't have a calendar... MAKE A LOVELY SCRAPGIRL calendar and mark those "special DATES" so grandchildren can see them and expect the outings!
3. Give them the benefit of the doubt... they may have overscheduled and hoped you would be easier to disappoint than someone unrelated.
Posted 20 December 2008 - 07:51 AM
All of my others love me to death and make it known - They are wonderful grandchildren and I am so blessed to have had children that have become awesome parents with the most special parenting skills. I am always amazed at the things they do when it comes to parenting and it makes me wonder why I did so well with them and not with my adopted Chris. But he had birth problems and I think that is part of the problem.
Other than that, I am a very Happy Nanny! And feel very loved. And the other side of the family loves me too, so I think I am at least 3/4 of the way. Maybe someday, Jenni will open up with me and grow to like me. I am very loving with all her children and we do not understand her attitude, but there are 3 sisters in her family and the biological Dad says they have never been happy, so guess that explains it mostly.
My hopes are that things work out for you and that you are not so miserable - I know the feeling, believe me. Think HAPPY THOUGHTS and let time work for you. It will - I just know it.
Posted 20 December 2008 - 08:29 AM
I'm praying that the path will smooth out for you, that you will be able to spend more time together with this precious little person in your life.
Posted 20 December 2008 - 11:41 AM
So you just go ahead and vent all you want to, but to us...please don't say angry words you will not be able to defend or retract. And hopefully, the next time you have plans everything will go smoothly for you.
The best thing you can do is to make absolutely sure that your granddaughter sees you and your DH acting like responsible, compassionate adults with HER best interests at heart, and to make sure every minute she spends with you is quality time.
Go ahead and write that paper yourself, the one giving you full authority and visitation privileges. This will help you deal with this anger today. And remember, living well is the best revenge!
This is good advice. Hope you can live with love in your heart, which can affect/effect your relationships. Finding a way to bless the mom will change your vocabulary and maybe your time with your granddaughter. Knowing you have the gift of time and love for gd can build you up. What is causing the mom to pull back? Sorrow, fear, selfishness? You can overcome each of these objections. Hope you can see the blessings God has for you today.
Trying for 200 by the end of the month. And still hope for some encouragements, too?