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momentousangel

Never Say To A Cop

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I got this in my e-mail this morning and it kind of made me chuckle so thought I'd share it here. :)

Never Say To a Cop

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

5. Are You Andy or Barney?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

8. I pay your salary!

9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around.. That's how far ahead of me they are.

12. When the Officer says "Gee Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

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My dad got pulled over once in Texas for going 77 in a 55 zone. When the cop asked him why he was going so fast, dad replied, "Well, the only reason I can think of is that my foot was da*n near all the way to the floor." The cop jerked his hand so hard (while trying not to laugh) that he ripped the ticket he was filling out. He just turned over to the next ticket, and asked my dad not to do that again, because he had to account for the tickets.

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:rofl: about the officer ripping hte tichet. I used to work in a fast food restaurant ions ago, and one morning I was running a bit late, to top off already running late, I was pulled over. When I asked why I was pulled over I was told "you didn't get to work on time so now my coffee tastes like water," in the town I lived in at the time, only about 900 people, everyone who was anyone knew everyone, so anyhow, later that morning when the officers came in for coffee, I was sure to remind the one who pulled me over that I should have written him a ticket for causing me to be even later to work, lol.

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Well. Massachusetts State trouper's don't have a sense of humor or maybe it was just the one that pulled me over. When he asked me if I knew why I was being pulled over, I replied" I assume you think I was going to fast!?" Big time ticket in my new COMPANY car, didn't go over will with the bosses!

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momentous angel - glad you shared that email - it was cute!

My stepfather is a retired minister. One day he was pulled over for speeding. The patrolman noticed on his license that he was a minister and only wrote the ticket for the lowest amount. After my stepfather pulled back onto the highway, the patrolman pulled him over again. The patrolman asked for the ticket back because he didn't feel right giving the ticket to a preacher! Guess it pays in more than one way to be close to God!

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These are great! I especially love the part where the officer ripped the ticket trying not to laugh!
:rofl:
[quote name='momentousangel' post='27814' date='Nov 20 2005, 03:12 PM']12. When the Officer says "Gee Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"[/quote]
My best friend doesn't drink, but if he did, I could hear him saying this one!

:gathering:

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