Toilet Training! AGH!
Posted 31 December 2008 - 05:43 PM
Posted 31 December 2008 - 05:47 PM
Posted 31 December 2008 - 05:58 PM
We have a subscritption to American Baby magazine, the only thing I have found it usefull for is that Peyton likes to look at the babies when she sits on her potty. Now, whenever she goes into the bathroom, she points to the magazine rack and asks for the "Baby" and she will sit down on the potty with her mag.
Another thing is that when we put her big girl panties on her, we tell her how pretty they are, and that she wants to keep them pretty. I'll say something like, "Ohh Peyton, you looks so pretty in your panties. Big Girls wear panties, and don't potty in their panties. Big Girls go potty in the big girl potty"....just encourage and repeat that alot, so one day it will click.
So far though, she has only tinkled in her potty chair once. But she is getting better at telling us when she goes Poo in her diaper, only after the fact. I think we just have to have plenty of patients. I have a feeling that potty training is going to be just one of those things when the little light bulb goes off in their heads when they are ready!
Good Luck Bethany!!
When the Power of Love overcomes the Love of Power, the World will know Peace.
»»»My Blog: Audrey Playing House«««
Posted 31 December 2008 - 06:04 PM
Posted 31 December 2008 - 06:23 PM
We didn't/don't push it. She'll get it when she gets it.
Posted 31 December 2008 - 06:34 PM
Happy New Year!
Posted 31 December 2008 - 06:34 PM
For about two weeks, she peed in her pull-ups (she had been poo-ing in the potty for awhile) all the time, and I never mentioned the potty at all. And, after about two weeks of "testing" me to see if I really meant I wasn't going to mention it, she started using the potty on her own, all the time. She is now 4 and has been pretty reliable about using the potty, only having an accident now and then.
SO, my advice is just let it go. They'll eventually "get" it -- unless there is some developmental or medical reason, have you ever seen a kindergartener in diapers? The best thing I ever did was to just let "nature" take its course.
Posted 01 January 2009 - 01:33 AM
Posted 01 January 2009 - 03:16 AM
A true friend reaches for your hand and touches your heart. ~Author Unknown
Posted 01 January 2009 - 08:56 AM
Posted 01 January 2009 - 11:21 AM
Here is the chart I used (made out of scrapgirls supplies, of course. ): Potty Training Chart. It was so easy & fun to do - I laminated it, and we used 1 sticker for peepee, and 2 for pooping, and every time she reached the end of the row, there was a little prizing waiting for her. The first few rows were rocky. You could give something like this a try -- stickers are huge motivators for kids. I did this chart for 3 of my kids -- my oldest daughter, I went to the toy store and bought a toy for her (that she had picked out), and put it at the top of the refrigerator, and told her when she went potty all the time, she could have it. She was trained in a day, seriously.
It's just all about the timing.
check out My Gallery
Posted 02 January 2009 - 03:55 PM
For lack of a better name:
Patty's Potty Training Plan
This is my generic plan of action for potty training young kids. Please know that I do not presume to know it all, or think of myself as an expert. I'm just sharing what has worked for me. It's advice that I have gleaned from others and put into practice over several years. And so far it has worked 6 times out of 6. A friend of mine has done the exact same thing with her 4 boys and it has worked for her as well.
Pre-teaching Steps (begin around 18 months):
1. Teach your child the difference between wet and dry. Talk to them about their diapers, a washcloth, etc. While helping you put clean wet clothes into the dryer, etc. Teach them that dry is better (for their pants!).
2. Teach them how to use sign language to mean that they need a diaper change. I used to say the words "diaper-change" and pat my side/buttock just before sending my toddler to the changing table. By 18 months they could usually imitate my words with something that sounds like "die-chain!" and would make the sign almost subconsciously.
3. Don't allow them in the bathroom until they are "big enough" (except for bathing of course). This will give them the sense of growing up and they can take pride in their new skill when it comes. It also helps when there is a younger sibling in the house. It kinda goes with the "rites of passage" idea. Prepare them for the big day when they are actually big enough to have the privilege to use the bathroom. Even do a "count down" chart.
4. A week before the big day, go out with your child and buy several dozen pairs of underwear or panties, some of which are "special". You can borrow most of them, but I recommend buying some special new ones, too! Tell your child what they are for and how excited you are for him to use them. Talk about how mom and dad wear underpants/panties and they're grown up! I have said, "When you are big enough, you can wear panties (or underwear), too".
5. While you are at the store buy large bag of a sweet treat of some kind as your reward for each success. (smarties, jelly beans, gummy bears, chocolate chips, mini marshmallows, etc). Check to see if you have a CLEAR jar, or rubbermaid container to hold the goodie jar. Plan to keep this on a shelf or counter within sight of the potty chair. This is a VERY important part of the plan. Do not substitute stickers or cheerios trying to be more healthy... it just won't work! They weary of such things quickly and it no longer motivates. You're both in it for the long haul... so make it worth it to them to stick with it. Also, buy several variations of beverages.... gatorage, kool-aid, juice, whatever... and maybe even some fun cups to drink them in (like the kind with crazy straws going up the sides). If you don't already have a digital timer or a wind-up egg timer, get one now.
In review, you need to have: treats, beverages, and a timer. A special potty chair is optional. Oh, I also like to have plenty of picture books on hand as well. And a chair or step stool near by for me to sit on while keeping them company, if they're using the big potty.
6. If this is your first child to potty train. Decide between you and your husband what words you want to use to describe the various parts and functions. Number 1 and number 2? Pee-pee and poop? Go-wet and go-dirty? etc. Remember that others will be hearing these words from time to time too. ;-)
7. If this is not your first child to potty train, then you have a great advantage!! For 2 or 3 days before, enlist an older sibling in the home to be the role model(s). Have the role model sit on the potty chair and do their thing! When they stand up have the "student", the role model, and mama all look and see what was left behind... praise the role model (clap hands; say "What a big girl!! etc etc) and make a show of giving them one of the candies from the goodie jar. The "student" does NOT get any candy. Only the child who put something in the pot gets it. Do this a couple times per day prior to the Big Day.
THE BIG DAY (I usually do this around 20-23 months):
On the big day: Mom and dad, you need to plan this day (actually more like a three day period) to be completely free of all unnecessary responsibilities! no shopping trips, no church, no nothing!! My husband and I try to tag-team this time so someone was always available to carry out our other responsibilities. If husband is not available perhaps grandma can come over. I have done this alone with a young nursing baby (and 3 other siblings), but it's a bit more draining that way.
TAKE AWAY THE DIAPERS!! If you are serious about training, then you need to stick with it! No pull-ups! No diapers in the car "just in case"! No diapers at the grocery store!! NO DIAPERS!! No exceptions!! Lay a couple of towels down under the napping child is you really feel you must. Expect it to be wet, but you may be surprised.
The Plan: Greet your "big girl" when she wakes up! Explain what you will do so she knows. Then, fill her up with whatever liquid she wants! (This stage is only for a short time. I feel they can get their nutritional needs met "overall"). Set a timer for every 10 minutes and take her in to the bathroom to go. The timer then becomes the "bad" guy. Don't be in the bathroom for a long time... maybe 5-10 minutes. With so much liquid, she is bound to accidentally go and then know what you expect. When she doesn't go, matter-of-factly say, "You didn't go this time. Maybe next time. We'll try again later ". When she goes in her pants, just say, "Uh oh, you went potty in your panties. You need to do that in the toilet" and then take her and clean her up. Now this next part is controversial - when they DO go in the toilet, I give them a small piece of candy (see list above). This is a great motivater for my children since they rarely get any candy otherwise! When the candy runs out, it runs out! (Try to have at least enough for 30 days... "30 days to a new habit") Another help is if they are attatched to a doll or stuffed animal or whatever, have the doll go, too. They love to pretend at this age (18 months and up).
Now, I would stick with the day 1 plan until they have a few successes in one day. This produces a TON of laundry, so be prepared! If your child refuses to try to sit when told to, then I recommend chastising. It then becomes a matter of disobedience (to try at least). They don't have to put anything in the potty, but refusing to sit when told to is disobedience. I usually have to do this once or twice for each child and then it's no longer an issue. Potty chair, special seat or toilet? It's completely a matter of preference. I've used them all! Like all the training we do with our children, it takes a few days of really trying times and then they've got it! On day two, you'll even be saying to yourself... "It's hopeless... we've may have had 2 successes... but we had 15 accidents!!! She just doesn't get it!!" Persevere! Day 3 is usually when the light really clicks on. Keep pushing the fluids and gradually lengthen the time between potty trips.
Don't ever ASK you child if they have to go potty! This will sabotage your efforts completely. They haven't learned enough about the process to be able to answer this truthfully yet. Just TELL them in a cheerful voice. "Time to go potty!". Only after at least a month of successes have gone by, and probably even longer will they be able to truly judge such a thing.
Also, don't be discouraged when the reward (candy) seems to have really clicked with them and they run to the potty every ten minutes and give you a half teaspoon of pee-pee in order to get a candy. THAT'S A GOOD SIGN!! Yes, they are manipulating the system... but it's OK! It's a sign of real progress. They truly understand the cause and effect. You might try to distract them with more things to do (playing outside, coloring, dancing to music, etc) and the trips will be become less and less often. But don't ditch the plan when this happens... just smile and say... "How did Patty know this would happen?".
After day 3 or 4 or when you are beginning to have more successes than failures then you can begin to incorporate your other children into the process to help you with the month ahead. Assign responsibilities to each child (or to just one "helper" if that's all you have to work with).
Child One: your job is to grab a rag and wipe up the "accident". Stand on the towel until the wet spot is invisible. (I use my 3 year olds for this)
Child Two: your job is to read books to sitting child. (any child of reading age)
Child Three: your job is to wipe the bottom, empty the potty, and give the reward. This child gets the same amount of candy as the potty-training child. We give one candy for "pee-pee" and two for "poop". You may also choose to reward the other helpers in a similar way. My children have all LOVED potty-training their siblings because of this. Remind this child to wash hands with soap after each time.. and BEFORE getting the candy. (Ask me how I know!)
Overall, reward and praise the positive and the successes!!
Lastly, but most importantly, bathe the entire process in prayer. Pray together as a family, pray with your spouse, pray with your child. Pray, pray, pray! And let me pray for you also!! Let me know when you are training, and I will keep you in my prayers! I'm just a keystroke away for support! But remember, these are just my ideas. I am no expert!! If you have a question about anything I've said, let me know!
Hope this stuff can help you, or at least give you an idea to try!
May God bless your endeavors,
Homeschooling Mama to 9 wonderful blessings (ages 14 to newborn).
"Yes, they're all mine. No, none of them are twins. Yes, we know what causes that. And no, we aren't planning to be done anytime soon."
Posted 02 January 2009 - 05:31 PM
So, my advice is to follow her lead. If she's really ready, she'll do it. If she's not, just know that she WON'T go to Kindegarten in diapers.
Posted 02 January 2009 - 06:11 PM
Posted 02 January 2009 - 09:36 PM
I know a lot of these can seem like common sense questions, but girls, the first time I ever even changed a diaper was the night that she was born.
Posted 02 January 2009 - 09:41 PM
Keep up the good work!!! What a great mom you are for even asking!
Posted 02 January 2009 - 11:51 PM
Patti's plan sounds great to me. The bribes are usually a great motivator, and consistency is huge. Unfortunately consistency is not my strong point, lol.
One big thing we've found - ditch the pull-ups. As far as my kids were concerned, they were no different than diapers. Even kids who were completely potty-trained, but needed to sleep in pull-ups seemed to forget what the toilet was as soon as they got those pullups on for bed.
Posted 03 January 2009 - 05:40 AM
My son was 3 1/2 before he was consistently bothered and we went cold turkey in the end as I knew he was ready but was just being lazy - he couldn't bear to break off from whatever he was doing to use the toilet. I am convinced that this was because we used pull ups.
In the end I just sat him down and said no more pull ups - just big boy pants and he had to remember to go to the toilet when ever he needed to
Within 2 days he was completely dry at night as well as during the day and we never ever had an accident which just prooves he was ready.
Whatever you do don't compare your child with anyone elses and don't stress about it, especially with another baby in the house. The first child often looses a little ground in areas like this when a new baby arrives. All things come in time.
Mid winter is not the best time to go commando in my experience lol!!!
I have a
Posted 12 January 2009 - 03:50 PM
The best advice I have is that when they are ready, they will do it and not before. As frustrating as it may be, it really doesn't work to do it on any other schedule than theirs. It sounds like she could be ready, but you also need to have the skills to take the clothes off, put them on, wash, etc. You can always try and if it doesn't go well after focusing for a little while, try some other time. Pull-ups can prolong the training, I think and they are expensive. Good luck in the process. I hope it goes well.
Posted 12 January 2009 - 04:08 PM
Posted 23 February 2009 - 06:37 AM
This last one was going once in a while, but not often. She really did it for fun at bed time with her sisters. Then she started taking her wet diapers off herself and running around naked with you-know-what stuck to her behind...LOL! So I decided she needed a little incentive. If she sat on the potty, she was allowed to pick an M&M for herself and each of her sisters. She would run to them and give them theri M&M (dad too if he was home) and everyone would say thank you and cheer. If she actually did something, she got Starburst! In a week she was solid, even out in public.
I'm a proponant of waiting until they show real signs of being ready. Friends who "potty trained" took 6 months to a year. Those of us who waited were done in 1-3 weeks with a rare accident after that. Usually because I forgot to remind her to try before we went out to run errands. Potties are hard to find in Europe...lol.