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Belle

They Walk Among Us

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They Walk Among Us -BE VERY WARY

 

This is a collection of letters sent to a South of England Newspaper

who had asked for examples of stupidity

 

*** SIGHTING No.1

My daughter and I went to the McDonald's drive through check-out window

to pay our bill and I gave the clerk a £5 note.

Our total bill was £4.20, so I also handed her a 20 pence piece.

She said, 'You gave me too much money.'

I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me £1 back.'

She sighed and went to get the Manager who asked me to repeat my

request.

I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're sorry but

we do not do that kind of thing.'

The clerk then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at MacDonald's !!

 

 

*** SIGHTING No2

We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us

that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough

motor on the opener.

I thought for a moment, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR

made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.

He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.'

I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not.

Four is larger than two..'

We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Moor Park , near

Watford .

 

*** SIGHTING No3

I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the

Highways Department to request the removal of the 'DEER CROSSING' sign

from our road.

The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars on this stretch of

road! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing, any-

more.'

Story from Potters Bar, Hertfordshire.

 

*** SIGHTING No 4

My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried Chicken and ordered a Taco.

She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'

He said he was sorry, but they only had Iceberg Lettuce.

From South Oxhey , Hertfordshire.

 

*** SIGHTING No 5

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee

asked,

'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'

To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I

know?'

He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened at Luton Airport

 

*** SIGHTING No 6

The traffic light on the corner buzzes when the lights turn red and it

is safe to cross the road.

I was crossing with an intellectually challenged friend of mine.

She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.

I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.

Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing

driving?!'

She is a Local County Council employee in Harrow , Middlesex. (And

she's NOT blonde)

 

*** SIGHTING No7

When my husband and I arrived at our local Ford dealer to pick up our

car, we were told the keys had been locked in it.

We went to the Service Department and found a mechanic working

feverishly to unlock the Driver's door.

As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door-

handle and discovered that it was unlocked.

'Hey,' I announced to the Fitter/Mechanic, 'it’s open!'

His reply: 'I know. I already did that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in St Albans , Hertfordshire.

 

STAY ALERT! They walk among us. AND THEY BREED!

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Ahhhhhh......you always make me smile, Belle! Thanks for the giggles!

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LOL, funny, Belle!

 

When DD worked at the local Dunkin Donuts as a salesperson standing in front hundreds of clearly labeled donuts, she was frequently asked, "What kind of donuts do you have?"

 

?????

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We have a dollar store in our town where every single thing is a dollar. I've always wanted to go in, point to something, and ask "how much is that?".

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We have a dollar store in our town where every single thing is a dollar. I've always wanted to go in, point to something, and ask "how much is that?".

 

Hahahaha, maybe that's what the customers were doing, although DD didn't think so!

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Love your funnies, Belle. I can always count on you to bring a smile to my face. And a giggle to my heart.

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I think I've met some of these people! LOL

 

Unfortunately so have I.

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