DDecker Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 Each year The Washington Post has a contest where readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for various words. And winners are... 1. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon. 2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained. 3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. 4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk. 5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent. 6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown. 7. Lymph (v), to walk with a lisp. 8. Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavored mouthwash. 9. Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller. 10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline. 11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam. 12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you. 13. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions. 14. Pokemon (n), A Jamaican proctologist. 15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck there. 16. Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts. ...and MountainWings own 17. Washington (v.), the day of the week that you do laundry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momentousangel Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 Some of those are some real doozies. Love the "Pokemon" one especially, . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ruralscrapper Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 Some of those are pretty funny Dee! What people don't think of! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DDecker Posted November 9, 2006 Author Share Posted November 9, 2006 I loved them when I read email this morning, I just had to share! I just hope they don't offend anyone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Durin Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Sharebear57 Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 Very funny, Dee! Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sprinklz Posted November 9, 2006 Share Posted November 9, 2006 I think gargoyle is my favorite! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MovieStar Posted November 10, 2006 Share Posted November 10, 2006 LOL - Funny!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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